Wednesday 4 November 2015

Feeling Pathetic

The doctor has checked - yes it is a nasty cough, no it isn't in my lungs.  Bear was fussed.

I worry about bear.  He was fussing about me so much yesterday.  He gets anxious in his own way.  I wish I knew what to do for the best.

As for looking for things, there are two issues in this house.  The first is the issue of bear.  Bear doesn't look.  His eyes move around sometimes but he doesn't see anything.  During the intense and detailed negotiations over homework at the weekend he wailed, 'I can't find my bookbag anywhere so how am I supposed to do my homework?'  I was standing two feet away.  I reached beside him and picked up the bag lying next to him in full view.

There is a book by Mrs C S Peel about recipes for Ten Shillings a Head per Week.  In it she writes a phrase, 'Threats and entreaties are alike in vain.'  I really know that feeling.  I have cajoled, coaxed, begged, pleaded and threatened bear.  I have been very clear, 'If I go upstairs and find your shoes straight away, I'll be cross.'  Then I stump upstairs, pick up his shoes that are in plain sight and stump down again.  Bear will look shamefaced, mutter sorry and then forget it.  This morning he managed to find one shoe but completely and utterly had an epic fail at finding the other.  It was next to the first shoe but two inches back.  At the moment the biggest project is getting bear to leave his shoes in the same place every night.  Currently that is an epic fail.

The other issue about finding things is quite frankly I am away with the fairies.  I feel like I should be over my father's death, but it still catches up with me now and again.  I think that is why I found the teabags in the drawer where I normally keep my shoe polish.  I'll catch up eventually.

1 comment:

  1. I'm glad you had your cough checked and that it is OK. Hope you are on medications to treat the cough.

    I'm sure Bear is worried because you represent security to him. Having recently lost his grandfather, he is now worried if anything should happen to you.

    As for being over your father's death, I believe it takes a longer time than we think. Give yourself at least a year; grief takes time to process. (((HUGS)))