Saturday, 4 January 2020

Testing Times

Sharon - I really miss cheese.

Mindo - all I can do is listen and try and support.

I'm so irritated by the tests and the pressure bear is feeling. I've encouraged him to talk about it where necessary, but not dwell on it. Bear doesn't think he does as well as he should at tests, so he gets even more stressed, and all his classmates are stressed and it becomes all about the dratted stress.  It's hard because neither DH nor I were particularly stressed by tests going in. I was a wreck coming out. I would be convinced I was an utter failure, even when I wasn't. I used to do really well in tests. I don't tell bear this.

DH and I have spent a lot of time sitting with bear and reassuring him that the tests are not the end of the world. There are always other chances or ways or paths to take. It would be easier if he could sail through these, but it doesn't matter if it goes wrong. We will manage something together.

Mind you, I'm trying to balance it with encouraging him to study and to work. I've always tried to reward effort, and he needs to learn how to put the time in. It just feels so hard at his age. And the things I would suggest, like going for a brisk walk, have to be put aside because of issues with his joints.

Today I had a run to the shops to pick up bear's blazer, then I popped into Tesco. I remembered bear had requested cereal, but went the long way around and fortunately passed an end cap with lots of reduced items. I had a quick look to see if there was anything we would use (a bargain you never use is not a bargain) and I scored big! There were a lot of spices on offer, such as celery salt and whole mustard seed. They are ideal for the sort of cookery bear is interested in, and don't go off, so I picked up an armful. Bear did the sums and, on around a dozen small jars, I saved something like £20. They were being sold off at 40p instead of £1.60. I didn't clear the shelf, but if there are any left on Monday, I may pick up some more. I left things like whole fenugreek seeds, but I know that they are in some curry recipes, so it may be worth a try. The wrapping paper was a bust, though, with no bargains worth it for me, so it was a very odd shopping basket of potatoes, carrots, parsnips, cereal and an armful of small spice jars. I also picked up a half price shirt for bear, which he approved, and I saved an extra 60p because of the Clubcard Plus. That was a good result.

Bear had his pal around, so I was able to leave them to it. I made soup for dinner (which was a success) and now we are going to watch Season 3 of the Great British Bake off.

Hugs to all.


  1. It sounds like you're really helping by listening and not adding any extra pressure on top of the stress of the tests. It is difficult to balance things out. I hate how much emphasis is put on tests.

  2. I think it is wonderful the way you let Bear try pretty much everything. As for exams yup some fly through and others stress. I believe if there were stats most would confess to stress. He will do wonderfully. Jean