I've spent a little while this morning filling in surveys and hope to get Amazon vouchers in return. It's made me think about Christmas and the cost.
I stopped and thought, 'what am I spending for?'
Bear has almost everything he wants. He is likely to get the fancy rubik's cubes that he wants as a reward for an good parent's evening and being in the Special Book. He has a room overflowing with stuff and we are reluctant to get him a console because that is harder to police than a pc. Besides, bear will be nine a few days after Christmas. That seems early for me to get something like an Xbox, but I know that many of his classmates have had them for years.
That leads on to the next issue. Bear will return to school where many kids will have had hundreds spent on them. I don't want bear to feel left out or be picked on because he has had a 'lesser' Christmas or because he is the only one in the class that hasn't got an Xbox or Playstation. On the other hand, I don't want him to feel his status relies on 'things'. I don't want him to feel that getting 'things' is the same as being loved.
Then again, this is the first Christmas bear has without any grandparents at all. Father always went overboard. Bear is not likely to be deprived, but there is still going to be a gap that means more than just not getting presents.
I just want to do what's best. I know that it isn't always a lot of stuff. In fact I was planning on cutting down stuff. I can guarantee that bear will get a lot more than he needs. I just wish I knew how to get the balance right.
It is hard to find a balance between indulging our children and trying to impart more worthy ideals, isn't it? I remember agonizing about getting a play kitchen for my daughter one Christmas when she was 4 or 5. It cost over $100 and I was wondering if I should spend that much on a gift for her; I didn't want to "spoil" her. My mother's advice was, "You only have 1 child, it's not like you have 6 or 7 children on whom to spend". Daughter received the kitchen and played with it for many years before we donated it.
ReplyDeleteCould you help Bear cull through his current toys and put some aside to give to charity, to keep the number of items in his room to a manageable amount?
Could you give Bear some "experiences" type of gifts? Visits to special places that he might be interested in, for example. Is there a science museum that he might like to visit? They will be different than what the other kids have, but he might enjoy them more, as it sounds like he enjoys science experiments, etc.
I think, no matter what you end up doing, your son will have a lovely Christmas and birthday.